Cleopatra, the Cat became my only friend in that small gloomy apartment that I thought I was a guest of with the host family of a single Mother,
her 2 daughters and son along with their 5 cats: Precious, Cleopatra, Fergie, Bella and Dusty. I slept on the floor on a single sofa bed thingy while the girls each had their own single bed. I was terrified of animals always, just because I was never exposed to them in any way. So cats were always and still are looked at as stray creatures too independent for their own good by the world when they are anything but soft, kind, warm and yet wary of the world around them as they should be. Cleo was the silent yet loving guardian Angel that greeted me when I got home after long days out roaming the streets of West Hollywood aimlessly or sitting at the West County library watching some of my fav shows on Hulu. Sipping that lovely mocha mint coffee at Urth Cafe right before sunset or at dusk. Cleo would be perched up on the elder daughter’s bed taking her usual beauty sleep and as soon as she’d open her eyes and see me, she’d jump out of the bed and circle around my legs with her sweet calls, purrs and meowing greets. We spent most of the time sitting together with me working on studies and she’d just sit on my lap or around it providing me warmth, even though it’s what she needed because she would shed her fur during the fall time. She was always cold, I could tell with so little fur on her, you could feel what cats are like underneath the fur just like humans, soft and warm. She became my family and I felt guilty because she was not my cat but the elder daughter’s. Somehow over time she spent a lot of time with me when I was around and not with the girl who was her owner. I don’t know how she felt about that but I felt badly because it’s not my place. Cleo was my true friend in my time of distress and happiness within all of the sorrow and trauma and drama. My favourite thing was kissing her forehead and when she would do that click click thing cats do when they hug you with their cheeks or face. I wonder if she’s still there finding the perfect secluded corner in the sun to take her royal naps like the Queen she is. In many ways, I experienced what it was like to have a cat who understood you and you understood her and her space. Cleo would nap a lot throughout the day and sometimes I would be bothering her because she was so adorable sleeping when I would go up and kiss her softly on the head, and she’d open one sleepy eye and acknowledge me and I’d let her go back to sleep. I remember this one time she was asleep and I just liked to watch over like she was my baby. Cleo would always find the warmest spot next to the pillows of course where the sun would shine a little. So I went up to just stroke Cleo’s head as usual and her owner suddenly came into the room and said, “What are you doing?”. And I think she thought I was trying to steal her stuff or something since I was just standing next to her bed and I said that I was just looking out the window where you could see a glimpse of the hills. Cleo was like a soul sister or any female bond you make that lasts telepathically. She was a kindred spirit, like me, who wanted to be left alone and would always find you if she needed you in her own time and space. That should be the foundation of any healthy relationship that is respecting each other’s hearts and space and freedom. 

LA BREA TARPITS [2014]

The sun peaks in through the leaves and branches of a tree emitting almost blinding streaks of of circular translucent radiance. If you focus your eyes into the ball of ray, you can almost see the colours of the spectrum – rainbows and all in the UV light. A bit of weak chemistry. I don’t care much about my poor handwriting at the moment as I’m laying in the grass listening to Secret Garden and soaking in the bits of nature around me. I wish I could see the clouds but the unfortunate smog of Los Angeles prevents them so. But the cloudless blue sky is still so beautiful in smooth and clear texture. Something about neoclassical new-age music that makes my heart soar. It feels so in tuned with the elements of nature. If I just close my eyes, I could almost be there in the olden ages. I like to escape into the aesthetics of different time periods and centuries often wishing I could have been a part of it all.